Wikipedia:Wikipediholic

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

This page contains material which is kept because it is considered humorous. It is not intended, nor should it be used, for any remotely serious purpose.

A wikipediholic or wikiholic or wikipediaholic or Wikian or wikiaddict who suffers from Wikiholisim, or obsession (addiction in some cases) with Wikipedia. It is often considered an obscure form of OCD. One of the main, and most common characteristics of the condition is the victim having a web browser window constantly open to the Recent Changes section of Wikipedia (or in the condition's slightly milder form, one's Watchlist), and pressing the "Reload" or "Refresh" button with a high frequency (sometimes leading to the wrist injury carpal tunnel syndrome). Others click the "random page" button instead. Still others endlessly track and monitor the edits of users whom they have become obsessed with. This disorder can lead to a serious decrease in productivity in all other areas of the victim's life, like any other addiction. That's why we're called Wikipedia ~~abusers~~users, after all.

Official "Are you a Wikipediholic" test if you think you are a Wikipediholic please take this test for diagnosis. Note: This is quite long, set a whole afternoon to take this test.

This is a recent phenomenon – having been made possible by the creation of Wikipedia in January 2001 – and affects primarily computer programmers, academics, graduate students, gameshow contestants, people living in the suburbs, news junkies, the unemployed, the soon-to-be unemployed and, in general, people with multiple interests and good memories. Telecommuters have also been known to feature this affliction.

Although people who fit those descriptions are welcome, especially the coconut monkeys, they should know that their fellow primates do not necessarily share their world-view, and that it may be better for wiki itself if they take a walk once in a while, and remember that their body consists of more than fingers, eyes, brain, and bladder. And that wiki exists to serve us, not as an end wholly in itself.

An alternative addiction is "wikistalking". Wikistalkers have gotten over their addiction to editing, however, enjoy watching, even the most minute changes. They most probably check Newpages continuously.

1 First Signs of Wikiholism
2 The stages of Wikipediholism
3 Alternatives to cure
4 See also

[edit] First Signs of Wikiholism

You turn from a reader to a writer.
You check your watchlist more than your email inbox.
You realize you're editing pages on a Sunday night.
You talk about Wikipedia frequently in daily life.
You have conversations with your sock puppet on the talk pages.
Your best friend is your sock puppet.
With your web browser closed, you feel the absence of not being logged on to the community.
You have an account with one or more other Wikipedias or other Wikimedia projects.
You accidentally sign emails with four tildes, try to italicize with apostrophes, etc.
You try to edit your sent items on your email account, thinking that they can be updated
You get confused when you can't find the little blue edit markers on books and other websites.
It is your birthday and you didn't realize it because you were busy editing Wikipedia.
If so much as one thing you don't know comes across your mind, you bolt for the nearest computer to see if Wikipedia has a page on it.
- If it does, you drop whatever you were doing before the urge took you and edit the page obsessively.
- If it doesn't, you obsessively check every single paper encyclopedia you have and search six different search engines for information on the subject. Then you proceed to write three screens worth on the topic and create an article on it, which probably will never be seen or thought about by another being in a thousand years.
You start playing WikiLadders - the game where you open two random articles and try to get from the first to the second using only the links in the first and subsequent articles. Created in Rotherham by Scott Singleton
...and then go back to try and do it again using fewer links.
You skip an important date to look up references for an article on a subject you'd never even heard of before you discovered Wikipedia.
You turn up late for work and bleary-eyed after a particularly aggressive XfD (and you even know what XfD means without looking it up).
Your state/provincial/national reference librarians know you by first name.
You add Wiki to most words in real life.
You still live in your mother's basement at the age of 30+.
Some Wikipediholics say this prayer before beggining a day long chain of edits.

The Wiki Prayer ([1], adapted from The Serenity Prayer)

God, grant me the serenity to accept the pages I cannot edit,

The courage to edit the pages I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

The Subterranean Wiki Prayer Revisited, Nos. 5 and 36

Johnny edits the Main Page

I re-write the Stone age

Napoleon and Shakespeare dress like a light bulb

We'll be here all night – refresh the same page

See also:

The 12 steps of recovery for Wikipediholics

We admitted we were powerless over Wikipedia; that our lives had become unmanageable.
Came to believe that an Author of Knowledge greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Made a decision to turn our obsession for editing and article creation over to the care of The Author of Knowledge as we understood Him.
Made a searching and fearless knowledge inventory of ourselves.
Admitted to the Author of Knowledge, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our factual mistakes and gaps.
Were entirely ready to have the Author of Knowledge remove all these factual defects.
Humbly asked Him (or Her) to remove our shortcomings by motivating us to be diligent in our research and study.
Made a list of all persons we had harmed by spreading unverified rumors, and became willing to make amends to them all.
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
Continued to take personal knowledge inventories and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with the Author of Knowledge, as we understood Him (or Her), praying only for knowledge of His (or Her) will for us and the power to carry that out.
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to Wikipediholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

With all due reverence and respect to those who suffer from genuine addictions and have found relief and recovery through twelve-step programs.

Those wishing to get rid of the habit, may wish to check themselves in the Clinic. Those who are sick of all these jokes and just want to talk to someone may wish to check the talk page.

[edit] The stages of Wikipediholism

[edit] Risk factors

Those who are the most at risk for catching the disease are those who have created an account, have access to a computer constantly and consistently, and who like the idea of a wiki. Those with Editcountitis may have elevated risk factors, as do hackers and Firefox enthusiasts (because of their exposure to open source technology).

[edit] Early stages

The patient finds that they "like" Wikipedia. They use the Main Page as a bookmark and consult the articles for information. They contribute to articles that they find lacking. They learn basic wiki markup. They can, however, give up now and cure themselves.

[edit] Middle stages

The patient uses the Main Page or their watchlist as bookmarks and their homepage. They reduce other online activities. They may join a WikiProject and contribute heavily to articles, as well as try editing outside the article and talk namespaces. They learn basic HTML and advanced wiki markup. They request to become an Administrator, and proudly show off their barnstars. Most refuse cures, which are still available.

[edit] Late stages

The patient uses their watchlist as their homepage. They may also explore the Recent changes. They reduce other "real world" activities. They may join multiple WikiProjects and contribute very heavily to many articles, as well as try editing heavily outside the article and talk namespaces. They learn advanced HTML and master wiki markup. They become an Administrator. They may use third party software to edit Wikipedia, and accumulate many barnstars. The thought comes to them, while reading this page, "this isn't funny; my contributions to Wikipedia are extremely important". Cures become scarce.

[edit] Extreme stages

The patient uses the Recent changes as their homepage and identifies as a Recent changes patroller. They reduce all other activities besides those relating to "real world" health and Wikipedia (and sometimes endanger the former). They join multiple WikiProjects and contribute very heavily to many articles, as well as to the core of running Wikipedia. They master HTML and rewrite the Manual of style. They request to be a Bureaucrat. They shun third party software, preferring the "raw" Wikipedia experience. They have so many barnstars that the patient takes them off their userpage because they take up too much room. Extreme denial may result, and cure is almost impossible.

[edit] Alternatives to cure

For those who see no end to their Wikipediholism may want to try Department of Fun to keep things interesting also keep an eye out for more Wikitivities. For instance write songs like the parody Hotel Wikipediaas laments of despair over their lost and ruined lives.

You might also want to try a cure of wikipatch. In case of dire emergency and should all else fail, consider checking in the Clinic for Wikipediholics.

You might join troll organizations, but, likely, you will find little solace there, since trolls have poor social support for each other, and they are still stuck here like the rest of us.

Perhaps the most effective solution of all is to embrace your wikipediholism, accept it as part of your identity, and cherish it. Don't just admit it - brag about it! And if others call you a wikipediholic, take that as a compliment. If they call you a troll, and they will, so what? Spread your Wikipediholisim! It is only a good thing! We're all trolls here: Eventually.