[edit] Civility

"We often contradict an opinion when it is really only the tone in which it is expressed that is unsympathetic to us."

—Friedrich Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human

Generally, it is a good idea to treat your fellow editors on Wikipedia with the utmost respect , kindness, and dignity. This is so for two reasons.

1. Philosophically and morally, it is the better way to go. Treat others as you would like to be treated, and so on. A system where everyone is kind with each other ensures that people will be kind to you, and that is infinitely preferable to putting up with the opposite.

2. More importantly, you get what you want that way. If you demand something of someone and do it disrespectfully, the person will often respond by going out of their way to not fulfill your request. This is normal human behavior. If you obey somebody who treats you like dirt, you are reinforcing that the best way to get you to do something is to treat you like dirt -- and likewise if you do well for people that treat you great, you give people a strong motivation to keep that up in the future.

There is a particular editor on Wikipedia who is famous for being exceptionally kind in her interactions with other users. She uses very supportive and reinforcing language while abundantly including small compliments in her messages to develop a strong rapport with the listener that extends well past when their momentary interaction is completed. I suspect that this is a strategy she has learned from her real-life occupation, which is one where she regularly deals with people in potentially volatile situations. It's a lot easier to complete your tasks if you have not just the cooperation, but the admiration of those whose assistance you need.

As I said I count number 2 as being more important than number 1. If building a great encyclopedia somehow required and depended on users being nasty to each other, I would tell you to insult me and generally piss me off whenever possible, though I'm sure I'd have a hard time dishing it back and thus I wouldn't be a very productive user here. Luckily that isn't the case, so we have two independent but good reasons to be nice to each other.