List of Prufrock Preparatory School Staff
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In the A Series of Unfortunate Events book The Austere Academy, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire attend Prufrock Preparatory School, which employs teachers and other staff.
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[edit] Vice Principal Nero
[edit] Mr. Remora
Mr. Remora is a teacher at Prufrock Preparatory School, teaching Violet Baudelaire. He loves bananas and is constantly seen eating one, smearing banana pulp on his mustache. In his class, students are forced to listen to tiresome and extremely short stories he dictates, after which he gives examinations on various objective aspects of the stories. He thinks that the Baudelaires are good students, and when Vice Principal Nero orders their expulsion, he suggests that Carmelita Spats be expelled instead; he also argues that skipping gym class to study is good time management. Lemony Snicket also reveals that Mr. Remora later retired from his teaching job because he choked on a banana.
Whether retired or not, Mr. Remora reappears in The Penultimate Peril with his fellow teachers, having been invited to a cocktail party at the Hotel Denouement, and makes a brief reference to running from the law (possibly a reference to Mrs. Bass's bank robbery). Hal also tries to communicate with him using a V.F.D. coded phrase; however, Remora fails to understand, meaning that he is probably not part of V.F.D. It is unknown whether he survives the fire at the hotel.
[edit] Mrs. Bass
Mrs. Bass is Klaus Baudelaire's teacher in The Austere Academy. She is obsessed with measuring in metric and all of her lessons are on measuring certain items. Like Mr. Remora, she thinks that the Baudelaires are good students, and dislikes Carmelita Spats.
She reappears in The Penultimate Peril, having been invited to a cocktail party at Hotel Denouement, wearing a thin black mask and a small white wig as a disguise; it is implied, as foreshadowed in The Austere Academy and Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography, that she has robbed a bank, having in her possession several bags of money marked with the name of Mulctuary Money Management. (For this reason, Mr. Poe is apparently pursuing her throughout the book.) She makes no attempt to conceal her crime from her co-teachers, Vice Principal Nero and Mr. Remora, and they in turn do not judge her, seeming to look on her robbery as an everyday occurrence. She also reveals that her invitation to the cocktail party asked her to bring all her valuables, and since she did not earn enough as a teacher to have valuables she was forced to turn to a life of crime. Despite her defence of the Baudelaires in The Austere Academy, when their own identities are revealed at the Hotel Denouement, she is quick to accuse them of bank robbery. It is unknown whether she survives the fire which destroys the hotel.
[edit] Miss Tench
Miss Tench was the former gym teacher at Prufrock Prep., but fell from a third-floor window shortly before the arrival of the Baudelaires. Although it is not stated whether she died from her fall or was merely heavily injured, she was nonetheless replaced by Coach Genghis.
[edit] Coach Genghis (Count Olaf)
Count Olaf disguises himself as a physical education teacher, Coach Genghis. The Baudelaires immediately recognize him as Count Olaf in disguise, but pretend not to know him at first.
Olaf, under the excuse that orphans have stronger legs, makes them paint a circle in luminous paint, and then perform "Special Orphan Running Exercises" (S.O.R.E.), laps around the luminous circle at night, for nine days. Olaf's plan was to make them so tired that they could not get their work done and get kicked out of school, allowing him to become their new guardian and then claim their fortune their parents left behind.
[edit] Cafeteria Workers
The White-Faced Women, associates of Count Olaf, disguise themselves as cafeteria workers in The Austere Academy. They help kidnap Isadora and Duncan Quagmire.
[edit] Librarian
There is a mysterious librarian character — referred to in Lemony Snicket: The Unauthorized Autobiography — who wears an unusual assortment of clothes and asks a question from the book Ramona Quimby, Age 8, seemingly as a way to identify other V.F.D. members.
