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My name is Eric and I have an issue with my homosexuality. I find myself tempted to wear my mother's clothes. Sometimes, when no one is looking, I take my sister's make up and apply it all over my face. I like the way I look when I'm all dressed up. I am looking for a man who will be there to hold my hand. Someone to walk with me in the middle of the starry night. I need a man to protect me from the gay bashers and the non-intellectuals who don't understand my ways of life. In return, I will allow this man to give me as much anal sex as he wants - for this alone is the greatest prize in the world in anyone's standards. Will you be the man of my dreams? The Evil Clown 21:46, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
We are evil! And by the way, we are also of extraterrestrial origin and we love to have sex with your mother.Pengwiin 11:25, 26 March 2007 (UTC)
I am a Penguin and I can vouch for it...ALL penguins are evil!Shindo9Hikaru 03:37, 29 March 2007 (UTC) I could say Cats are evil, same with dogs. But, dogs are definitely more evil. They're plotting. Their stupidity is a mask, I say! Baaah! Oh, and I discovered that Canned Pasta can give Rats superpiowers. SBKT 15:58, 30 March 2007 (UTC)
This fat clown just ate and is full, so you're safe...for now.
Fed the clown a live vandal. Two birds with one stone! Ninja! 23:54, 30 March 2007 (UTC)
The clown might feel the need to chow on down on a microwave oven to prove the theory "microwave food" is bad for us :-) - Bennyboyz3000 06:29, 15 March 2007 (UTC)
The clown may want to eat a Dragon. Warning! The dragon may try and eat him.
Engraving of Ouroboros who is a very hungry dragon swallowing its own tail by Lucas Jennis, in alchemical tract titled De Lapide Philisophico.
Peanut butter jelly time! Can't sleep, clown will eat me 13:49, 14 December 2006 (UTC)
Until this shows up, I've provided a simpler offering. —A 08:17, 14 February 2006 (UTC)
Did someone mention something about ordering some more marmot tartare? Can't sleep, clown will eat me 22:56, 24 February 2006 (UTC)
Not to butt in, but that's a nice marmot. The Big Lebowski. TKE 03:43, 27 March 2006 (UTC)
and ill have the scent gland :PBenon 03:59, 27 March 2006 (UTC)
I've just popped in for a byte or two. Mmmm, crunchy. Anotherpongo 13:04, 31 August 2006 (UTC) Eat it! Eat Susan or the Cake instead! Arrrgh! Dfrg.msc1 . 2 . Editor Review 07:09, 4 December 2006 (UTC)
Query: Is this perchance the clown that could have possibly eaten Bart, or the clown from Poltergeist that was being parodied? They both make me scared; I can't sleep now. Tim Sailor 02:09, 16 November 2006 (UTC)
Four months later and you're still giving me nightmares. __earth(Talk) 16:47, 18 May 2006 (UTC)
As long as I keep on editing Wikipedia, the demons of the night cannot catch me... (The demons have been vanquished!--Josh 01:31, 16 May 2006 (UTC)) K-UNIT 04:50, 5 April 2006 (UTC)
Can't sleep!!!! The person that is danger of being eaten by the clown will eat me!!!!--Adam(talk) 23:50, 3 April 2006 (UTC)
Please put some chicken noodle soup on your page. I have the flu (and can't sleep because I am hallucinating evil clowns). dbtfztalk 09:34, 6 March 2006 (UTC) Feelin' much better now. Thanks for the soup. :-) dbtfztalk 06:10, 29 March 2006 (UTC)
I am The top :p
Your username makes me smile! HeyNow10029 20:29, 15 February 2006 (UTC)
Looks Like I'm on top now, Windy ;-) --Goatrider 07:19, 12 February 2006 (UTC)
I AM AT THE TOP -WindFish 09:24, 6 February 2006 (UTC)
Mmmmmm, insomnia...... *gargle* Kntrabssi 05:32, 3 March 2006 (UTC)
Hmmm, all the food is good. I'm not an insomniac per se, but I like to stay up late, and we are oten on RC patrol at the same time during recent nights in the past few weeks. It can be pretty entertaining. One vandal kept adding nonsense about Chuck Norris to varoius articles, and I had no idea who he was before, so I was inspired to look at his article. Anyway, I like to eat snacks like candy, chips and pretzels when editing Wikipedia at night. Academic Challenger 09:51, 7 February 2006 (UTC)
I can never get to sleep at night. My mind is restless. Interesting name, by the way--Acebrock 06:29, 6 March 2006 (UTC)
Iron helps us play! -- Samir ∙ (the scope) 09:58, 11 March 2006 (UTC)
What's your favorite planet? Mines the sun. – ClockworkSoul 05:47, 13 March 2006 (UTC)
Need......appetizah! Man...sleep would be a good thing too. Kukini 07:32, 22 March 2006 (UTC)
I've never had regular sleeping paterns. I can never fall asleep when I want to. I got hooked on Conan O'Brien in middle school. But when I do finally fall asleep, it lasts. I'm afraid that if I win the lottery, I'd fretter away my days in blissful slumber. --Jeffrey O. Gustafson - Shazaam! - <*> 14:29, 24 March 2006 (UTC)
You add depth and meaning to the wikipedia experience...but make sure not to be exposed to over-illumination, a cause of circadian rhythm distrubance. Anlace 15:09, 25 March 2006 (UTC)
Also caused by the Irish [3]TKE 03:47, 27 March 2006 (UTC)
Can't sleep, waste of time. Considering Uberman schedule. Expect to crash for 16 hours straight 2 days in. ZoFreX 04:10, 7 April 2006 (UTC)
Can't sleep, vandal will eat me. :) Algebra 16:42, 7 April 2006 (UTC)
Vandals can't sleep! Can't sleep, clown will eat me will eat them. Keep it up! -- Szvest 12:59, 10 April 2006 (UTC)Wiki me up™
Hmm... you know, it's 3 A.M. somewhere... Matt Yeager♫ (Talk?) 23:35, 11 April 2006 (UTC)
The Federated States of Imnsonia... pop. 156 million and growing... Buchanan-Hermit™..SCREAM!!!.... 08:15, 14 April 2006 (UTC)
Ummm ... why don't you just say 'no'? Kaimiddleton 05:10, 24 April 2006 (UTC)
Let a wimple cancel ten owls. Well, cancel a wet simpleton. Ten cetaceans will mop well. A sceptical Ellen won't mewl. Cleduc 02:22, 27 April 2006 (UTC)
Clowns don't eat all of you silly. They eat you like fried chicken!!!-Gangsta-Easter-Bunny 12:16, 6 May 2006 (UTC)
Though you can't sleep because of a clown, you are the doom-bringer for vandals! Funnybunny (talk/Counter Vandalism Unit) 03:49, 27 May 2006 (UTC)
Hey, thanks for protecting my favorite articles against vandalism. And, to keep you awake whilst looking for vandals, here is another clown picture, and one of my favorites. : ) Madman 17:11, 31 August 2006 (UTC)
Wow, a lot of insomnimaniacs. ;) I didn't sleep very much at all last night (or the night before, but at least then I stayed in bed), so I got up at about half past midnight. Now I know that sleep is a good thing. :P —$ΡЯΙNGεrαgђ (-¢|ε|Ŀ|T|♫-) 19:38, 8 September 2006 (UTC)
Well, I slept like a charm. A little bothered by my big red nose, as usual, but tonight I didn't have trouble digesting that fat kid.--SidiLemine 09:03, 11 October 2006 (UTC)
I used to have dreams about a scary clown (seriously), but now I don't sleep, so it's no longer a problem.--The Great Llama(speak to the Llama!)
"You gotta believe me, Mandy! Clowns are nothing but ultimate EVIL!!! They want to become the dominant species on the planet-and they'll DESTROY US ALL TO MAKE IT HAPPEN! DESTROY US ALL!! DESTROY US ALL!! DESTROY US ALL!! DESTROY US ALL!!" Link 486
Can't sleep... must eat clownclowner chowder... — Editor at Large(speak) 22:59, 28 October 2006 (UTC)
I'm actually nocternal, does that still count? Dfrg.msc1 . 2 . Editor Review 07:09, 4 December 2006 (UTC)
Your name inspires to new heights of random acts of zaniness. Sethie 23:08, 6 January 2007 (UTC)
I am very much a night person, yes. Tonight though, it is partially caused by me being sick and not feeling like sleeping, while not particularly wanting to be awake either. Grandmasterka 10:19, 8 January 2007 (UTC)
I think I'm naturally nocturnal too... if left to my own devices I tend to go to bed when it's getting light. Unfortunately university doesn't mix well with being nocturnal! --Deskana(For Great Justice!) 11:00, 8 January 2007 (UTC)
Haven't you figured out? We're already in a giant clown. The whole universe is. I'm frightened particularly by the prospect that a large blob of gastric ooze may dissolve the planet. Any second now... --queso man 03:19, 28 January 2007 (UTC)
Well, clowns are supposed to be funny and entertaining to people of all ages.
A clown is not a cannibal. So you don't have to worry about it. King Lopez 10:48, 2 February 2007 (UTC)
Ask the clown if he would like to eat a nice bagel instead of eating you.
I tenth it ;P -- Nbound 06:36, 16 February 2007 (UTC)
I eleventh it :P (MUST KILL ALL VANDALS!!!!) -- Daandyman 11:31, 18 February 2007 (GMT)
I XIIth it. :D Cheers, S.D.¿п? § 03:03, 2 March 2007 (UTC)
BAH! ENOUGH! Who wants to come with me to go pig out at the fridge? :) DTD
The RickK Anti-Vandalism Barnstar
Thanks for your continuous efforts to keep maintain wiki-integrity! Jerry lavoie 11:10, 10 January 2007 (UTC)
The Tireless Contributor Barnstar
I award you, Can't sleep, clown will eat, with the tireless contributor barnstar for blocking 16,500+ vandals, protecting 1,500+ pages and deleting more than 5,000 pages on Wikipedia. I guess you really can't sleep. Great job! It was no wonder that you were given the tools to help assist with maintenance. I don't know where you want to put it, but you can have it wherever you want.--Wikipedier (talk • contribs) 05:22, 12 February 2007 (UTC)
You are da bomb!TNTfan101 02:15, 18 March 2007 (UTC)
Nope: he was => "boom". Extremely sexy 12:41, 18 March 2007 (UTC)