Professor Hubert Farnsworth

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Futurama character
Hubert J. Farnsworth
Age	162 (Appears in his 80s or in his 90s)
Gender	Male
Species	Human
Planet of Origin	Earth
Job	Mad Scientist and owner of the Planet Express Delivery Company.
Relatives	Great Great... Uncle and Grandfather: Philip J. Fry (Clone): Cubert Farnsworth
First Appearance	Space Pilot 3000
First Line	"Who are you?"
Voiced by	Billy West

Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth (born April 9, 2841) is the extremely elderly proprietor of the Planet Express delivery service in the fictional animated television series Futurama. The Professor is pushing the limits of even 31st century old age at about 160.

The professor is the only living relative of Philip J. Fry, (except for the professor's own clone, Cubert), being his great-great-great-etc. nephew. Though never stated, he is therefore logically the descendant of Philip's only sibling, his brother Yancy Fry, Jr. However, since it is revealed that Philip J. Fry is his own, and therefore Yancy's, grandfather due to his time-traveling exploits in the series, Farnsworth is logically in fact Philip Fry's direct descendant via his brother/grandson Yancy.

Contents 1 Character 2 Inventions 3 Achievements 4 Production

[edit] Character

The Professor roughly amounts to a mad scientist (which he has admitted to being on several occasions), named after television inventor Philo Farnsworth with the same first name as UC Berkeley Philosophy professor Hubert Dreyfus, of whom early writer and producer Eric Kaplan is a former student. He is a senile, deranged, and unpredictable old man who is both a maniac and a genius. He has a gift and a passion for the creation of doomsday weapons and atomic supermen, and is a danger to himself, his employees, and the universe in general. He has put at least one parallel universe in peril with his inventions.

The Professor teaches at Mars University and worked for Momcorp, but he currently spends his time inventing ridiculous devices and coming up with equally suicidal missions for his crew. While at Momcorp, he fell in love with the CEO, Mom, only to leave her and Momcorp when she decided to weaponize his "QT McWhiskers" toy, an anthropomorphic cat toy that shot rainbows from its eyes.

The Professor is characterized by his catch-phrase "Good news, everyone!" frequently followed by very bad news — often one of his semi-suicidal missions. Another is his exclamation of surprise, "Sweet zombie Jesus!". In the first two episodes, he had the catch phrase "but I am already in my pyjamas", which was replaced by the former phrase. Also, though not a catchphrase in general, he often says "Wha?" when unaware of the situation, or when someone questions a statement he has just made, showing his senility. He also often completely contradicts himself, like the time when he told his crew they were to gather "Honey. Ordinary honey." When Leela says that it doesn't sound dangerous, he replies with "This is no ordinary honey!" The Professor also has a tendency to enunciate his /wh/ sounds, and frequently hypercorrects his /w/ sounds to sound like /wh/ as well, e.g. "Whell, let's get started."

One frequent source of humour in the show is the Professor's amazingly advanced age, which manifests itself in senility and general physical decrepitude. While generally friendly, he is sometimes prone to sudden fits of bitter contempt for arbitrary things. The Professor is also known for his inclination toward exhibitionism and does not hesitate to make naked appearances in public, stating that, like pine trees and poodles, the "primitive notions of modesty" of the twentieth century are long gone. Despite this claim, Hermes mentions in the first Anthology of Interest episode that he's been cited several times for public nudity. He also mentions that, being 160 years old, he is old enough to rent and purchase "ultra-porn". Beyond that, the professor's occasional brief verbal digressions about his own life imply a somewhat colorful sexual past, which he often concludes with a nostalgic "Oh, yes...".

The Professor is one of the oldest human beings living on earth (excluding those who have been cryogenically frozen or are kept alive as heads in jars), a title he acquired after the events of the episode "A Clone of My Own", in which it was revealed that upon turning 160, all humans are collected by the "Sunset Robot Squad" and sent to live out the rest of their days in isolation aboard the gigantic "Near Death Star" (a pun on the Death Star of the Star Wars universe). After his crew rescues him, Farnsworth returns to Planet Express to resume the life he originally had before being removed by the Sunset Robot Squad. In "Teenage Mutant Leela's Hurdles" his age is stated to be 161, and after swimming in the fountain of aging, reports that he is "Even older! Huzzah!".

Although being in his 160's, the Professor became quite shocked in the episode "The Sting", when Fry (who was technically 1025 years old after being frozen for a millennium, thereby 863 years older than the professor) accidentally died, remarking "This makes me the oldest living member of my family!" and burst into tears of this realization (although this was in Leela's dream).

The Professor rarely worries about the safety of the crew, viewing them as a means to an end, as evidenced in the first episode. After remarking that he was looking for a new crew for his intergalactic space ship, he was asked "what happened to your old crew?" His response was "Oh, those poor sons-of-b.., but that's not important! What is important is that I need a new crew!" He quite frequently sends them on dangerous missions even when he has the foreknowledge that they will probably not make it back alive. His missions are typically those other delivery companies won't take, such as delivering subpoenas to mob-controlled worlds or casual deliveries to virus-infested planets. Even the commercial that he had produced for his company makes several remarks to this effect, including "When other companies aren't crazy or foolhardy enough" and "our crew is replaceable, your package isn't", the former showing the crewman running through a minefield and the latter showing him being carried away by a giant bird. During another episode, when the crew and his ship are sent off to war, he immediately tries to hire another crew. When his old crew returns, he is clearly surprised they survived, remarking, "Oh God you're alive! I mean, thank God you're alive," then remarks to the applicants, "Come back in three days, a week at most" indicating just how low he thinks their chances of survival are. Even his family relationship to Fry doesn't do much (if anything) to reduce his ardor for particularly difficult and deadly delivery missions. The only exception to this seems to be the mission his old crew died on. He warns his crew not to go, and apparently, also warned his old crew not to go. When asked about the nature of his delivery "business", he once clarified that he viewed his company more as "a source of cheap labor, like a family".

Another running joke through-out the show is that the Professor's eyes are never seen. In some episodes his glasses are removed but the view is always shown from behind his head so his eyes cannot be seen. In the episode where he seduces Mom, she removes his glasses and says "your eyes were always the nicest shade of milky white." However, his eyes were seen in Futurama Comics issue #29.

It is also implied on multiple occasions in the show that the Professor's favorite food is human meat. In the episode "Roswell That Ends Well" he orders Soylent Green products from a diner. The Professor's cannibalism is a common running joke throughout the series.

He also has a genetic disease called "wandering bladder."

[edit] Inventions

While Professor Farnsworth is a tenured professor at Mars University, he has spent most of his professional life making various ridiculous inventions (or, more often, half-making-and-then-forgetting-about-them). Some of his "notable" achievements include:

• Afterburners (for Dark matter engine) – Give 200% fuel efficiency to the dark matter engines of the Planet Express ship.
• Albino shouting gorillas – To shout out his love for Mom from rooftops.
• Anti-pressure pills – a rectal suppository, roughly the size of an emu egg, which protects people from the heavy pressures of the ocean.
• Atomic Monsters – In the episode "A Fishful of Dollars" the Professor alludes to his past dream of creating a race of atomic monsters - "Atomic supermen with octagonal-shaped bodies, that suck blood through straws out your..." This ambition is stated as his own reason as to why people say he is mad.
• Superhuman Atomic Basketball Team – The only atomic superhumans actually seen created by the Professor. Instead of them ageing normally or using accelerated growth, the Professor had his crew harvest chronotons and then had the superhumans drink them. The results nearly destroyed the space-time continuum. The superhumans were nearly a success, as they were leading the Harlem Globetrotters; however, Fry replaced one after being injured, and somehow lost the game. Notably none of these monsters were octagonal or are known to drink blood. The DVD commentary identifies the supermen as Thorias (a mutant with a cannon in his chest), Armo (possessed 5 arms), Arachnion (a spider-like creture), Lazor (fired beams from his eyes) and Growtrian (stretched long distances).
• Badass Gravity Pump – Affixed to the Planet Express Ship and used to move stars. Co-invention with Ethan "Bubblegum" Tate of Globetrotter University, seems to have disappeared after its application in stopping the time-skips he created. It cost all of Earth's money to build.
• Clone-O-Mat – Clones organisms. Can, in some cases, also give the clone the memories of the organism from which the DNA originated. It is also used by Leela for pickling in the comic book.
• Cubert Farnsworth (Clone of the professor) – Might not be counted as an invention but Cubert exclaims "In your entire life your only half-decent invention was me and I didn't turn out like you wanted either."
• The Coolometer – A hand-held device which measures the coolness of whomever it is pointed at in units of "MegaFonzies".
• Dark matter engine – Part of the Planet Express ship. Moves the universe around the ship instead of moving the ship through the universe. He claims the design came to him in a dream, (a spoof of Back to the Future) but later forgot it in another dream. The engine's dark matter is usually supplied by Nibbler.
• The Death Clock – A clock that tells the user how long they have to live when a finger is inserted. It's "occasionally off by a few seconds, what with free will and all". It seems to be less reliable than the Professor thinks. The death clock is a parody of the many "death clock" websites that populate the Internet.
• An array of doomsday devices – Featured in the episode "Time Keeps on Slippin'". The one that is used to destroy the source of the time slippage creates an implosion on detonation. Professor Farnsworth, when trying to decide which weapon to use, says "I suppose I could part with one and still be feared." Several of the doomsday devices are taken from other cartoon series.
• Electric frankfurter – Briefly mentioned during a musical number in "How Hermes Requisitioned His Groove Back" ("They poo-pooed my electric frankfurter," he sings).
• Electronium Hat – Provides intelligence to Fry's monkey roommate Guenter at Mars University by harnessing the power of sunspots to produce cognitive radiation (as opposed to the "preposterous science fiction mumbo-jumbo" that is genetic engineering).

• F-ray – Similar to an X-ray, except it can look through anything, even metal. Uses a controlled neutrino beam in some way. It can pop balloons and blimps when pointed at them and produces harmful radiation that is known to kill sperm.
• The Fing-longer – A glove with an extended index finger, allowing the wearer to operate machinery from "great" distances. In "Anthology of Interest I", he didn't invent this, but he wishes he had after seeing it on the What-If machine (see below). By the time of "The Birdbot of Ice-Catraz" he has invented one, or acquired one from sources unknown.
• Farnsworth's Killbots – A range of at least one model of combat robot, which he apparently manufactures himself. His Roboticon 3003 stall claims: "Housewives prefer Farnsworth's Killbots". The neighbouring stall is "Wernstrom's Killbots", sparking an argument between the owners and causing the two killbots to show disdain for senseless aggression and go for a paddleboat ride.
• The Maternifuge – An alien cross species genetic analyzer that spins at 10,000 RPM to determine a subject's parent, provided at least one parent is present. Dr. Zoidberg lives in it. When introducing it, the Professor says, "Even I laughed at me when I built this alien cross-species analyser." In order to determine the parent of a child, all potential parents must climb inside the centrifuge-like chamber. As it spins, the people inside are ejected one by one into a mercifully padded wall until only the true parent remains.
• Q.T. McWhiskers – Originally envisioned by Farnsworth as an anthropomorphic, cat-like, children's plush toy which meowed and shot rainbows out of its eyes when petted on the head. This robot was changed by his ex-lover and CEO Mom, into an eight-foot tall war robot with neutron lasers in its eyes, causing Hubert to leave Momcorp and Mom. Farnsworth argued that things that were 8 feet tall were not cute, thus the failure of his colossal Tammy Tinkle doll. Mom's weaponized version of the toy is seen later in the episode, meowing as it fires its neutron lasers at everything in sight. New models are sixteen feet.
• The first robot capable of qualifying for a boat loan – Mentioned briefly in Leela's movie about the professor in "A Clone Of My Own".
• The Relative Box – It appears in the episode "Space Pilot 3000." Fry and Professor Farnsworth use it to prove that they are related. To use the device, two people insert one of their fingers into a hole located on either side of the box. The box makes a ding! sound to indicate that those two people are in fact related.
• Two-dings Machine – A machine which creates glow-in-the-dark noses. It also "does other things! Why shouldn't it?" The only other thing mentioned is its capacity as a translator, though it just translates what it's given into "Betacrypt 3, a language so complex there's even less chance of understanding it." The machine signifies that the translation is complete with two dings of a precise timing, though it periodically dings once or twice in a larger or smaller interval for no apparent reason. The Two-dings machine creates multiple barrels of toxic waste for each glow-in-the-dark nose it creates and is later used to create boxes which contain alternate universes.
• Smell-o-scope – Allows the users to smell odors from astronomically long distances ("If a dog craps anywhere in the universe, you can bet I won't be out of the loop.")
• A Universal Translator which can decipher any language in the universe. Unfortunately, it can only translate into one "incomprehensible, dead language" – French (for dubbing reasons the "dead language" was changed to German in the French version of Futurama).
• What-If Machine – A machine which depicts events following the posing of a hypothetical question/situation. It plays the "logical outcome" as a video scenario on a screen included in the machine. The What-If Machine is featured in the "Anthology of Interest" episodes, in which the questions posed result in humorous scenarios on the screen. The Professor once commented that it wasn't "worth the gold it's made of". After fine-tuning it (with a hammer), he says that it can predict any scenario within one-tenth of a plausibility unit. It can be activated by both voice command and a large slot-machine-like lever on the side.
• The Who-ask Machine – A machine briefly used in "Anthology of Interest 2" to select the next person to pose a question for the What-If machine. When used by the professor, it responds with "Amy", but quickly follows with "I mean Leela" when Amy gets excited.
• A machine that can make anyone sound exactly like the Professor – Originally designed to allow people to hand down edicts to their minions in the Professor's glorious, booming voice, it was also used by Cubert and Dwight Conrad to prank-call members of the Planet Express crew in "The Route of All Evil". The Professor also claimed that his invention did not have any target consumer, only "targets".
• Adolf Hitler Shark – The Professor claims to have put Adolf Hitler's brain inside the body of a Great White Shark.
• Beautiful Women, Fast Cars and Trendy night spots – mentioned in "A Clone of My Own" as being the Professors' inventions.
• The Re-animator – Appearing in the Futurama video game, this is able to create an exact duplicate of a person quickly upon (premature) death, requiring only the person's X-rays, a DNA sample and some scrapings from the inside of the deceased's tennis shoes. Resembles and functions like a giant toaster. As this information is from the game, it is not necessarily considered canon.
• The Angry Dome – A dome built into the Planet Express building that Farnsworth uses to vent out his anger.
• Sport Utility Robot - Seen in flashback in "Crimes of the Hot", this pollution-spewing machine became the prototype for all modern robots, leading to increased global warming. The Professor invented it while working for MomCorp.

[edit] Achievements

Professor Farnsworth, while sometimes seen as a laughing stock in the scientific community, has also been highly honored. For stopping global warming and Richard Nixon ("Crimes of the Hot"), Nixon awards him with the Polluting Medal of Pollution (which spews smog). He also received the Academy of Inventors award for stopping the giant trash meteor from destroying New New York City ("A Big Piece of Garbage").

[edit] Production

Professor Farnsworth is voiced by Billy West, who also voices Fry, Dr. Zoidberg, and Captain Zapp Brannigan.

Hubert J. Farnsworth is also the legal name of the character Skeeter in John Updike's 1970 novel Rabbit Redux.

v • d • e Futurama
Media
Episodes • Comic books • Video game • Bender's Big Score
Characters
Fry • Leela • Bender • Professor Farnsworth • Doctor Zoidberg • Hermes • Amy Zapp Brannigan • Kif Kroker • Nibbler • Cubert • Calculon • Mom Recurring human characters • Recurring robot characters • Recurring alien characters • Secondary characters
Universe
Planets: Amphibios 9 • Eternium • Omicron Persei VIII Alien races: Cygnoid • Decapodian • Neptunian Politics and religion: Earth Government • Robotology • D.O.O.P. Technology: Gadgets • Suicide booth • Planet Express Ship • Nimbus Other: Timeline • Blernsball • All My Circuits • The Scary Door • Slurm • Products • Locations • Animals